[i mean technically wouldn't that still count as lan wangji killing him if he's the reason he goes tumbling to his death in lava!! IT'S FINE.
Anyway this is stupid and he makes a face.]
A "touch this thing and you'll be cold until the day you die maybe unless you find someone else to touch instead" charm.
[So yes, yes he did go out of his way to find Lan Wangji with the express intent to hold his hand. Or arm, as it were. GOOD ENOUGH FOR HIM.]
You really haven't seen any of the charmed things at all yet? Not a single one? There are a lot out there, people have been running into them all week. I was doing so good at avoiding them, too... [SIGH.]
And, look. Maybe Lan Wangji heard people talking about these charms and just assumed it was a ploy related to prom. Maybe he's just been so fucking distracted by the shirt he's still got tucked under his other arm that he hasn't paid any attention to school happenings lately. Maybe he just intentionally blocked it out because if he didn't, his mind would probably dream up a situation exactly like this one!! WHO KNOWS.
Regardless, this is, apparently, a real thing that is really happening. Even with the obvious evidence, though, Lan Wangji's finding it hard to trust that this isn't just one of Wei Wuxian's attempts to rile him up, or to tease him, since Lan Wangji's pretty firm about rejecting physical contact with people.
Wei Wuxian never seems to notice that he doesn't do that with him, though... no, no, no getting distracted. There's a simple way to test this!
He looks at Wei Wuxian for a minute, far too calm considering they're surrounded by lava--then twists out of his grip, but only to reach out again.]
Give me your hand. [He can't prove anything if Wei Wuxian just barnacles onto his arm, okay, he needs direct contact for. Evidence. Yes.]
[Can't believe Lan Wangji is out here having a wholeass existential crisis and Wei Wuxian is just thinking about how much better life would be if he didn't have the core temperature of an ice cube right now.
WOW THOUGH well damn he's not about to pass up this choice opportunity?? Even like this, he can still spare a crumb of totally normal just-two-bros-chillin-in-a-hottub excitement for having a totally legit reason to hold his hand. Without hesitation, both his hands fly for Lan Wangji's and he clasps onto it tightly.]
Don't be cruel and shake me off, okay? I really will freeze to death.
[As his CHILLY CORPSE-LIKE HANDS can probably attest to.]
(shigure voice) has he, uh, sandwiched your hands before
[LISTEN his Wei Wuxian-related crises are a very important part of his daily life. Especially now that he's been bold enough to ask to hold Wei Wuxian's hand--the magnitude of it doesn't show in his expression, of course, but he stares down at their clasped hands for a long time, very intently.
Sure enough, he can already feel Wei Wuxian's fingers beginning to warm from the contact. Hunh. Without thinking, he opens his mouth again--]
Wei Wuxian is reveling in the warmth returning to his hands, though. This is the pure, unadulterated joy of someone finally being able to curl up next to a campfire after tromping around in the snowy woods all day. WHAT A QUESTION THOUGH - one he doesn't hesitate to answer.]
I am! It's terrible! I'm surprised I'm not dead yet since I've been losing every scrap of body heat I have for hours! [It has been like, 20 minutes tops, god.] See?
[He's already claimed this hand as his for now apparently, so he just moves it up to his face, where he leans his (also cold) cheek against Lan Wangji's palm.
Like, at least he didn't just shove Lan Wangji's hand down his shirt this time.]
[And Lan Wangji... does not, but boy does it seem like he does, with the way his eyes widen and he instinctively jerks a little bit. His ears are absolutely burning at the implications, and it takes him a very long time just to relax enough for his hand to rest properly against Wei Wuxian's face.
He should've bought the damn cardigan.
Apparently it wouldn't help now, but he can't help much either, with one of his hands full. So, a little awkwardly, he shoves the wrapped parcel between them.]
Put this away. [Stick it in your breadsleeves so that he can use both hands, and also don't open it because then he'll have to explain The Hairbrush.]
[ANYWHERE just put it away so he can hold your hands again, fool!! At least even he can't bring himself to say something like "I can't warm you up with one hand"... small mercies.]
Oh! What? You actually got me one? Lan Zhan, I'm surprised! Is it a cardigan? Can I open it now?
[He's squishing the package with his one hand like that will reveal its mysterious contents to him... HOLDING HANDS WILL HAVE TO WAIT NOW. Now he's curious! What's in the bag!!!]
[WOW THAT WAS SURPRISINGLY FORCEFUL. What the fuck is in this package, a cardigan with a nipple window??
Unfortunately, as always, a strong reaction just riles up his inner bully and makes him want to tease. He gives Lan Wangji's hand a little squeeze, leaning forward with a grin.]
Hah - don't you know, Lan Zhan? When you tell me no, I just want it more.
[THE ABSOLUTE WORST... He doesn't want to lose his source of warmth though, so he's quick to back off, waving the package around.]
[It is this until proven otherwise, which Lan Wangji probably still thinks is just a weird pattern and not mesh.
But-- good, at least it's put away. Now he won't have to explain why he's returning the brush that's folded up in there as well, which is just. Too fucking awkward a conversation to have in person. AT LEAST LET HIM EXPLAIN VIA TEXT MESSAGE where he can take as long as he wants to put his words together.
Lan Wangji relaxes minutely once the package is gone--enough that, with his other hand free, he only hesitates briefly before he holds it out in offering. It's a much bigger gesture than he's making it out to be, but he's not about to indicate that and embarrass himself further, so here they are.]
[WHY DID HE NOT TOUCH IT TO FEEL THE MESH, DID HE NOT NOTICE WHEN HE WAS FOLDING THE BRUSH AWAY OR DID HE JUST NOT NOTICE oh my god. What a fuckin fool. Absolutely the worst.
It's fine though since Wei Wuxian is also the worst... He blinks owlishly at the free hand offered to him, canting his head to the side a little.]
Oh? Are you offering to warm me up, Lan Zhan?
[WHAT A CHIVALROUS FOOL. Wei Wuxian laughs - more of an actual laugh and less of his usual cackling - and immediately GRABS THAT HAND. Which he then promptly plants on his other cheek, so Lan Wangji is sandwiching his face now.]
--except then Wei Wuxian is stealing his hands for lewd face-sandwiching purposes, and it's decidedly not fine anymore. He inhales sharply, but he was the one who offered, and Wei Wuxian really is ice cold to the touch. It would be cruel to deny him, and Lan Wangji doesn't make a habit of taking things back as it is, so. Here they are.
Staring at Wei Wuxian's face when they're like this is probably weird, and it's definitely inappropriate, but Lan Wangji can't bring himself to look away. Terrible.
He stands there, trying to keep his thoughts under control, until the silence would be uncomfortable for anyone besides Wei "utterly impervious to awkwardness" Wuxian. Eventually, he trusts himself to open his mouth again.]
[Yeah he's lucky Wei Wuxian just lets any and all awkward shit slide like water off a duck's back. Does he even notice how awkward the direct staring and silence is?? PROBABLY NOT. He's too busy feeling triumphant for some reason that he's actually managed to get Lan Wangji to hold his face like this, even if it's because he's freezing to death.
As the seconds pass, it does seem like he was telling the truth about the charm, though. His cheeks warm up beneath Lan Wangji's palms, and his posture relaxes a little, not full of quite so much of the rigidity that comes along with Being Cold.]
Mmhm! It's nice - much better than before! I'm still pretty chilly, though.
[Just in case Lan Wangji was thinking "oh okay good I can let go now". NO. NO ESCAPE. He keeps Lan Wangji's hands locked with his own, humming out a cheery little nonsense tune as the lava fuckin burbles away above and below them. This is fine.]
You don't mind doing this until I'm warm again, do you? It's not like we have anywhere else to go right now anyway.
[It's fortunate that Wei Wuxian makes the decision for him, because it saves Lan Wangji the awkwardness of having to come up with a legitimate reason for not wanting to move away.
His face is far, far too thin to even consider asking if it works without direct contact (NO PUBLIC GROPING ALLOWED), let alone stepping closer so that Wei Wuxian could snuggle, or anything of the sort. He lets Wei Wuxian into his space all the time, but he has no idea how to indicate that he's not just okay with it. That he likes it, even--that he wants Wei Wuxian to mean it.
Even if he did know, that's not a conversation to have while they're both trapped. So all Lan Wangji can do is huff quietly.]
It is fine. [A pause.] We can sit, if you'd like.
[He's getting the feeling they might be here for a while...]
[god i absolutely hate that wei wuxian would 100% take advantage of the situation to be a fullass gremlin but HE'S 100% GONNA TAKE ADVANTAGE OF THE SITUATION TO BE A FULLASS GREMLIN. Which in this case means crowding Lan Wangji over toward the corner of the stairwell as soon as he suggests sitting down.]
Yes, yes - let's sit! I'll be able to conserve body heat better that way.
[IT'S ONLY PARTIALLY BULLSHIT it's true that the best way to warm up is to hunker down in a little ball. But as he tugs Lan Wangji down to sit with him and immediately presses against his side whenever he finally wrangles him to do so, it's clear his intent is just to steal as much body heat from this poor soul as possible and warm up that way instead. He's also still clutching one of Lan Wangji's hands in his own, which he holds to his chest like a teddy bear.]
Is this fine? Do you mind it, Lan Zhan? I'm feeling warmer already!
[THIS IS YOUR GREMLIN, AKI. THESE ARE YOUR CHOICES.
Lan Wangji, for his part, didn't prepare his lil ol' heart for such abrupt agreement. He blinks, allowing himself to be herded and dragged down out of sheer surprise, and by the time he tenses up, Wei Wuxian's already snuggling up against him.
WELL... THIS IS HIS LIFE NOW, APPARENTLY.]
...Mm.
[It's the most noncommittal reply ever, but he's fighting down the instinct to jerk away and accidentally shove Wei Wuxian into the lava (which is, in turn, a defense mechanism to protect him from his Inappropriate Desires). THERE'S A LOT GOING ON HERE not that it shows on his face.
Very, very slowly, he manages to relax, so that Wei Wuxian isn't cuddling up to a statue. Then, after a lot of internal deliberation, he carefully shifts his arm so that it's wrapped more securely around Wei Wuxian. He's as tentative as a rabbit and liable to flinch away and lose his nerve if a bird chirps too loudly nearby, but listen. HE'S TRYING.]
[THANKS FOR NOT SHOVING HIM INTO THE LAVA. To be honest, he's pretty surprised he isn't shoved away, regardless of whether it's into the lava or just into the opposite wall or something. When Lan Wangji starts to relax, it fills his chest with a warmth he can't say is entirely because of the charm, and a strange sort of longing that he promptly shoves into a box and refuses to examine closely.
He has other and more important things to focus on, anyway. Like BEING A SHIT. He's absolutely just being a barnacle at Lan Wangji's side now, even being so BOLD as to rub his cheek against his shoulder.]
You're the best! Have I told you that lately? You really are, you know. I'd have died of hypothermia by now, haha - what a stupid way to go.
[STOP DON'T RUB ON HIM LIKE THAT he's going to expire from gay panic before they even escape this hallway and then they'll never make it to prom...
He doesn't roll his eyes, nor does he give Wei Wuxian his usual Look, since he's staring straight ahead and trying to keep calm. He does, however, huff quietly.]
You know plenty of people who would be willing to help you. [He doesn't particularly want to think about it, but Wei Wuxian's popularity is an undeniable fact.]
[Wow how is he supposed to be able to enjoy tormenting Lan Wangji if he won't even look at him?? Terrible. Wei Wuxian pouts obnoxiously, pulling his face away a little so he can get a better look at him.]
This close to prom? There's no way I trust anyone to not try killing me in some stupid, weird way that would be hard for me to see coming.
[Implying death is not hard to spot when it comes from Lan Wangji... BUT LOOK. HE'S NOT WRONG. HE DIES ONCE A WEEK, IT'S ALWAYS STUPID. He has a lot of friends but just look at how many of them try to kill him. At least with Lan Wangji he just knows he has to avoid getting stabbed!
And this way, he doesn't have to think too hard about the actual reason he'd bother to seek Sir Slab Of Marble himself out first before and above literally anyone else. God.]
[NO MERCY, NO SYMPATHY WHATSOEVER. ...Also yeah he's not wrong and honestly Lan Wangji doesn't even care. He isn't aspiring to be the most creative assassin around, he just wants to be efficient. He can follow Wei Wuxian's logic, as well; outside of assignments, Lan Wangji usually only kills people who've broken the rules; Wei Wuxian is the first person to goad him into it just by riling him up, and he still never engages in kills just for fun.
Lan Wangji carefully does not think about why he has no desire to kill Wei Wuxian when his personal space is being invaded like this. THEY'RE DOING GREAT WITH THEIR NOT THINKING OVER HERE.]
[He'd wave a hand dismissively right about now if he wasn't busy koala-ing still. Maybe he's playing a little game of "how long with Lan Wangji let me get away with this"... He's already a little surprised by the apparent answer, which is longer than .01 seconds. He never anticipated this??]
I don't invite them to! [He says, having literally offered his service as a murder victim up to Itaru a week or two ago.] They just know they can have a good time with me, probably.
[Absolutely terrible phrasing. HE REALLY CAN'T EVER LEAVE WELL ENOUGH ALONE.]
[Lan Wangji's a little surprised at himself, honestly. Maybe it's the fact that no one else can stumble upon them here that's making him more receptive. It could be because he'd steeled himself earlier, since he had been actively seeking Wei Wuxian out, before they ended up here.
(Or maybe he wants to see, just once, what it's like if he doesn't automatically fight against what he wants.)
Regardless, Wei Wuxian's not going to make it easy on him, it seems. Lan Wangji fixes his gaze on the wall across from them, ignoring the urge to cross his arms like a child.]
Hm.
[HE PICKED UP ON THAT PHRASING AND HE DOESN'T LIKE IT ONE SINGLE BIT.]
[God please no a petulant Lan Wangji is one of the most fun to heckle... Actually all Lan Wangjis are the most fun to heckle BUT LOOK.
What a prickly reaction, though... What a prickly guy! He sighs, curling his fingers into the crook of Lan Wangji's elbow to give his arm a petulant tug or three. He is absolutely pouting. What a goblin-like creature. Just throw him into the lava goddamn.]
Aiyo, Lan Zhan - why don't you ever look at me when we're talking unless you're trying to kill or scold me? Is my handsome face too much for you? Come on, don't talk to the wall. I'm much more interesting!
no subject
Anyway this is stupid and he makes a face.]
A "touch this thing and you'll be cold until the day you die maybe unless you find someone else to touch instead" charm.
[So yes, yes he did go out of his way to find Lan Wangji with the express intent to hold his hand. Or arm, as it were. GOOD ENOUGH FOR HIM.]
You really haven't seen any of the charmed things at all yet? Not a single one? There are a lot out there, people have been running into them all week. I was doing so good at avoiding them, too... [SIGH.]
no subject
And, look. Maybe Lan Wangji heard people talking about these charms and just assumed it was a ploy related to prom. Maybe he's just been so fucking distracted by the shirt he's still got tucked under his other arm that he hasn't paid any attention to school happenings lately. Maybe he just intentionally blocked it out because if he didn't, his mind would probably dream up a situation exactly like this one!! WHO KNOWS.
Regardless, this is, apparently, a real thing that is really happening. Even with the obvious evidence, though, Lan Wangji's finding it hard to trust that this isn't just one of Wei Wuxian's attempts to rile him up, or to tease him, since Lan Wangji's pretty firm about rejecting physical contact with people.
Wei Wuxian never seems to notice that he doesn't do that with him, though... no, no, no getting distracted. There's a simple way to test this!
He looks at Wei Wuxian for a minute, far too calm considering they're surrounded by lava--then twists out of his grip, but only to reach out again.]
Give me your hand. [He can't prove anything if Wei Wuxian just barnacles onto his arm, okay, he needs direct contact for. Evidence. Yes.]
no subject
WOW THOUGH well damn he's not about to pass up this choice opportunity?? Even like this, he can still spare a crumb of totally normal just-two-bros-chillin-in-a-hottub excitement for having a totally legit reason to hold his hand. Without hesitation, both his hands fly for Lan Wangji's and he clasps onto it tightly.]
Don't be cruel and shake me off, okay? I really will freeze to death.
[As his CHILLY CORPSE-LIKE HANDS can probably attest to.]
(shigure voice) has he, uh, sandwiched your hands before
Sure enough, he can already feel Wei Wuxian's fingers beginning to warm from the contact. Hunh. Without thinking, he opens his mouth again--]
You are like this all over?
[closes my eyes intensely]
I FUCKING HATE THIS AND THEM
Wei Wuxian is reveling in the warmth returning to his hands, though. This is the pure, unadulterated joy of someone finally being able to curl up next to a campfire after tromping around in the snowy woods all day. WHAT A QUESTION THOUGH - one he doesn't hesitate to answer.]
I am! It's terrible! I'm surprised I'm not dead yet since I've been losing every scrap of body heat I have for hours! [It has been like, 20 minutes tops, god.] See?
[He's already claimed this hand as his for now apparently, so he just moves it up to his face, where he leans his (also cold) cheek against Lan Wangji's palm.
Like, at least he didn't just shove Lan Wangji's hand down his shirt this time.]
I HATE IT MORE
He should've bought the damn cardigan.
Apparently it wouldn't help now, but he can't help much either, with one of his hands full. So, a little awkwardly, he shoves the wrapped parcel between them.]
Put this away. [Stick it in your breadsleeves so that he can use both hands, and also don't open it because then he'll have to explain The Hairbrush.]
NO I DO
What the heck though?? He blinks, reluctantly releasing Lan Wangji's hand so he has a free one to grab this mystery item.]
Put it away where? What is it?
[He's not gonna shove shit into his breadsleeves without knowing what he's shoving in there!!]
punts u into the sea
[ANYWHERE just put it away so he can hold your hands again, fool!! At least even he can't bring himself to say something like "I can't warm you up with one hand"... small mercies.]
:moyai:
[He's squishing the package with his one hand like that will reveal its mysterious contents to him... HOLDING HANDS WILL HAVE TO WAIT NOW. Now he's curious! What's in the bag!!!]
no subject
[NOT NOW. He sure sounds forceful about that wow... don't look at him JUST PUT IT AWAY.]
Open it later. It will get destroyed if you drop it. [look he's not wrong]
no subject
Unfortunately, as always, a strong reaction just riles up his inner bully and makes him want to tease. He gives Lan Wangji's hand a little squeeze, leaning forward with a grin.]
Hah - don't you know, Lan Zhan? When you tell me no, I just want it more.
[THE ABSOLUTE WORST... He doesn't want to lose his source of warmth though, so he's quick to back off, waving the package around.]
But fine, fine! I'll store it away, I won't peek.
[INTO HIS SLEEVE IT GOES.]
no subject
But-- good, at least it's put away. Now he won't have to explain why he's returning the brush that's folded up in there as well, which is just. Too fucking awkward a conversation to have in person. AT LEAST LET HIM EXPLAIN VIA TEXT MESSAGE where he can take as long as he wants to put his words together.
Lan Wangji relaxes minutely once the package is gone--enough that, with his other hand free, he only hesitates briefly before he holds it out in offering. It's a much bigger gesture than he's making it out to be, but he's not about to indicate that and embarrass himself further, so here they are.]
no subject
It's fine though since Wei Wuxian is also the worst... He blinks owlishly at the free hand offered to him, canting his head to the side a little.]
Oh? Are you offering to warm me up, Lan Zhan?
[WHAT A CHIVALROUS FOOL. Wei Wuxian laughs - more of an actual laugh and less of his usual cackling - and immediately GRABS THAT HAND. Which he then promptly plants on his other cheek, so Lan Wangji is sandwiching his face now.]
no subject
--except then Wei Wuxian is stealing his hands for lewd face-sandwiching purposes, and it's decidedly not fine anymore. He inhales sharply, but he was the one who offered, and Wei Wuxian really is ice cold to the touch. It would be cruel to deny him, and Lan Wangji doesn't make a habit of taking things back as it is, so. Here they are.
Staring at Wei Wuxian's face when they're like this is probably weird, and it's definitely inappropriate, but Lan Wangji can't bring himself to look away. Terrible.
He stands there, trying to keep his thoughts under control, until the silence would be uncomfortable for anyone besides Wei "utterly impervious to awkwardness" Wuxian. Eventually, he trusts himself to open his mouth again.]
...Better?
no subject
As the seconds pass, it does seem like he was telling the truth about the charm, though. His cheeks warm up beneath Lan Wangji's palms, and his posture relaxes a little, not full of quite so much of the rigidity that comes along with Being Cold.]
Mmhm! It's nice - much better than before! I'm still pretty chilly, though.
[Just in case Lan Wangji was thinking "oh okay good I can let go now". NO. NO ESCAPE. He keeps Lan Wangji's hands locked with his own, humming out a cheery little nonsense tune as the lava fuckin burbles away above and below them. This is fine.]
You don't mind doing this until I'm warm again, do you? It's not like we have anywhere else to go right now anyway.
no subject
His face is far, far too thin to even consider asking if it works without direct contact (NO PUBLIC GROPING ALLOWED), let alone stepping closer so that Wei Wuxian could snuggle, or anything of the sort. He lets Wei Wuxian into his space all the time, but he has no idea how to indicate that he's not just okay with it. That he likes it, even--that he wants Wei Wuxian to mean it.
Even if he did know, that's not a conversation to have while they're both trapped. So all Lan Wangji can do is huff quietly.]
It is fine. [A pause.] We can sit, if you'd like.
[He's getting the feeling they might be here for a while...]
no subject
Yes, yes - let's sit! I'll be able to conserve body heat better that way.
[IT'S ONLY PARTIALLY BULLSHIT it's true that the best way to warm up is to hunker down in a little ball. But as he tugs Lan Wangji down to sit with him and immediately presses against his side whenever he finally wrangles him to do so, it's clear his intent is just to steal as much body heat from this poor soul as possible and warm up that way instead. He's also still clutching one of Lan Wangji's hands in his own, which he holds to his chest like a teddy bear.]
Is this fine? Do you mind it, Lan Zhan? I'm feeling warmer already!
no subject
Lan Wangji, for his part, didn't prepare his lil ol' heart for such abrupt agreement. He blinks, allowing himself to be herded and dragged down out of sheer surprise, and by the time he tenses up, Wei Wuxian's already snuggling up against him.
WELL... THIS IS HIS LIFE NOW, APPARENTLY.]
...Mm.
[It's the most noncommittal reply ever, but he's fighting down the instinct to jerk away and accidentally shove Wei Wuxian into the lava (which is, in turn, a defense mechanism to protect him from his Inappropriate Desires). THERE'S A LOT GOING ON HERE not that it shows on his face.
Very, very slowly, he manages to relax, so that Wei Wuxian isn't cuddling up to a statue. Then, after a lot of internal deliberation, he carefully shifts his arm so that it's wrapped more securely around Wei Wuxian. He's as tentative as a rabbit and liable to flinch away and lose his nerve if a bird chirps too loudly nearby, but listen. HE'S TRYING.]
no subject
He has other and more important things to focus on, anyway. Like BEING A SHIT. He's absolutely just being a barnacle at Lan Wangji's side now, even being so BOLD as to rub his cheek against his shoulder.]
You're the best! Have I told you that lately? You really are, you know. I'd have died of hypothermia by now, haha - what a stupid way to go.
[NOT AS STUPID AS HIS OTHER DEATHS.]
no subject
He doesn't roll his eyes, nor does he give Wei Wuxian his usual Look, since he's staring straight ahead and trying to keep calm. He does, however, huff quietly.]
You know plenty of people who would be willing to help you. [He doesn't particularly want to think about it, but Wei Wuxian's popularity is an undeniable fact.]
no subject
This close to prom? There's no way I trust anyone to not try killing me in some stupid, weird way that would be hard for me to see coming.
[Implying death is not hard to spot when it comes from Lan Wangji... BUT LOOK. HE'S NOT WRONG. HE DIES ONCE A WEEK, IT'S ALWAYS STUPID. He has a lot of friends but just look at how many of them try to kill him. At least with Lan Wangji he just knows he has to avoid getting stabbed!
And this way, he doesn't have to think too hard about the actual reason he'd bother to seek Sir Slab Of Marble himself out first before and above literally anyone else. God.]
no subject
[NO MERCY, NO SYMPATHY WHATSOEVER. ...Also yeah he's not wrong and honestly Lan Wangji doesn't even care. He isn't aspiring to be the most creative assassin around, he just wants to be efficient. He can follow Wei Wuxian's logic, as well; outside of assignments, Lan Wangji usually only kills people who've broken the rules; Wei Wuxian is the first person to goad him into it just by riling him up, and he still never engages in kills just for fun.
Lan Wangji carefully does not think about why he has no desire to kill Wei Wuxian when his personal space is being invaded like this. THEY'RE DOING GREAT WITH THEIR NOT THINKING OVER HERE.]
no subject
I don't invite them to! [He says, having literally offered his service as a murder victim up to Itaru a week or two ago.] They just know they can have a good time with me, probably.
[Absolutely terrible phrasing. HE REALLY CAN'T EVER LEAVE WELL ENOUGH ALONE.]
no subject
(Or maybe he wants to see, just once, what it's like if he doesn't automatically fight against what he wants.)
Regardless, Wei Wuxian's not going to make it easy on him, it seems. Lan Wangji fixes his gaze on the wall across from them, ignoring the urge to cross his arms like a child.]
Hm.
[HE PICKED UP ON THAT PHRASING AND HE DOESN'T LIKE IT ONE SINGLE BIT.]
no subject
What a prickly reaction, though... What a prickly guy! He sighs, curling his fingers into the crook of Lan Wangji's elbow to give his arm a petulant tug or three. He is absolutely pouting. What a goblin-like creature. Just throw him into the lava goddamn.]
Aiyo, Lan Zhan - why don't you ever look at me when we're talking unless you're trying to kill or scold me? Is my handsome face too much for you? Come on, don't talk to the wall. I'm much more interesting!
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)