[Thank god for Lan Wangji's quick actions and BLESSED CONTACT. He's latching on to Lan Wangji's arm as he's pulled along, partially because he doesn't want to lose his footing and die AGAIN in ANOTHER STUPID WAY, but mostly because he's finally not freezing. Death can pry this warmth out of his cold dead hands.]
Hey, why are you asking like that? Don't look at me, I don't know what it is! I didn't do anything this time!
[This time, unlike the millions of other times he's been at fault for shit.]
For the time being, though, Lan Wangji doesn't say anything about the contact, since he's a little preoccupied with FLEEING FROM THE LAVA RACING DOWN THE HALL BEHIND THEM. Fortunately, there are stairs ahead of them that lead back outside; maybe if they're lucky, whatever triggered this stupid lava curse will end once they're in fresh air.
He drags another sheet of ice up behind them, but he gives no verbal warning--not a single "be careful" or "hold on". The only indicator Wei Wuxian might have is the brief tightening of Lan Wangji's grip on his wrist before they're being all but launched to the top of the stairs to GET THE HECK OUTTA DODGE. Probably this would've been better if Lan Wangji had wrapped an arm around him or something, instead of risking dislocating Wei Wuxian's shoulder, but he's still kind of in his "I don't touch others" phase, so. Alas.]
It doesn't actually dislocate but one sure would think as much with the fuss Wei Wuxian kicks up over it...]
Ow, ow - Lan Zhan, give me a little warning next time! Do you think I have detachable limbs or something? My arm's not going to fall off like a gecko's tail if you tug too hard, you know!
[BUT HEY at least they're at the top of the stairs and the lava seems to stick to the floor they left behind!
Too bad that looking up to the next floor reveals that it too has turned to lava.]
[Lan Wangji's about to tell him something dismissive, like "you are fine" or "haste was needed", but given half a second to catch his breath, he becomes abruptly aware of 1. the lava up ahead of them, and 2. the fact that Wei Wuxian's hands are still way, way too cold considering they're surrounded by lava.
...One of these is probably more pressing than the other. Yet he stops, frowning down at where he's grasping Wei Wuxian's wrist.]
[YEAH MAYBE WORRY ABOUT THE LAVA?? Though at least it seems contained to the respective halls and doesn't seem like it's about to come zooming at them in the stairwell...]
I know! You only have to deal with my cold hands - imagine how I feel!
[HE'S SUFFERING. Even surrounded by lava he feels The Chill In His Bones. Being reminded of it makes him curl his hands around Lan Wangji's arms even more tightly out of reflex, suppressing the shiver that runs up his spine.]
[THE LAVA IS FINE and they're fine and also, apparently, trapped here until further notice... can't believe the school itself is a shipper.
Technically, they could probably try to fly over the lava or something, but that seems like it's just asking for trouble. They're stuck here for now... so Lan Wangji turns his attention fully to Wei Wuxian, searching his face carefully.]
[The school is also tired of their bullshit and just wants them to get together already, god.
Wei Wuxian looks more or less fine, though! No telltale signs of poisoning - sweating or pupil dilation or dry lips. He just looks like a miserable person who's been standing out in the snow for too long... So he shakes his head and then makes a face.]
Have a little more faith in me than that, would you? I hate being poisoned.
[So naturally, he's used his stupid genius to figure out about fifty different ways to keep himself safe from it. PROBABLY WHY PEOPLE JUST KEEP GOING FOR GOOD OL' FASHIONED STABS AND BLUDGEONS.]
Apparently Lan Wangji's missed the memo about the cursed objects, though; with the most likely reason eliminated, he just frowns, moving to let go of Wei Wuxian's wrist.]
[If being surrounded by lava can't warm Wei Wuxian up, Lan Wangji certainly won't be able to?! Or so he thinks, and thus assumes this is just Wei Wuxian being his usual obnoxious self... so he sighs, and lets it happen, like usual. And also partially because even a halfhearted attempt to shrug Wei Wuxian off of him might result in sending him tumbling back down into the lava pit. Only he gets to kill Wei Wuxian, okay. :|]
No. [Maybe because he doesn't pick up random things he finds!!! Or maybe his reputation got him out of this one, because what's the point of a freeze charm on an ice prince.] What charm?
[i mean technically wouldn't that still count as lan wangji killing him if he's the reason he goes tumbling to his death in lava!! IT'S FINE.
Anyway this is stupid and he makes a face.]
A "touch this thing and you'll be cold until the day you die maybe unless you find someone else to touch instead" charm.
[So yes, yes he did go out of his way to find Lan Wangji with the express intent to hold his hand. Or arm, as it were. GOOD ENOUGH FOR HIM.]
You really haven't seen any of the charmed things at all yet? Not a single one? There are a lot out there, people have been running into them all week. I was doing so good at avoiding them, too... [SIGH.]
And, look. Maybe Lan Wangji heard people talking about these charms and just assumed it was a ploy related to prom. Maybe he's just been so fucking distracted by the shirt he's still got tucked under his other arm that he hasn't paid any attention to school happenings lately. Maybe he just intentionally blocked it out because if he didn't, his mind would probably dream up a situation exactly like this one!! WHO KNOWS.
Regardless, this is, apparently, a real thing that is really happening. Even with the obvious evidence, though, Lan Wangji's finding it hard to trust that this isn't just one of Wei Wuxian's attempts to rile him up, or to tease him, since Lan Wangji's pretty firm about rejecting physical contact with people.
Wei Wuxian never seems to notice that he doesn't do that with him, though... no, no, no getting distracted. There's a simple way to test this!
He looks at Wei Wuxian for a minute, far too calm considering they're surrounded by lava--then twists out of his grip, but only to reach out again.]
Give me your hand. [He can't prove anything if Wei Wuxian just barnacles onto his arm, okay, he needs direct contact for. Evidence. Yes.]
[Can't believe Lan Wangji is out here having a wholeass existential crisis and Wei Wuxian is just thinking about how much better life would be if he didn't have the core temperature of an ice cube right now.
WOW THOUGH well damn he's not about to pass up this choice opportunity?? Even like this, he can still spare a crumb of totally normal just-two-bros-chillin-in-a-hottub excitement for having a totally legit reason to hold his hand. Without hesitation, both his hands fly for Lan Wangji's and he clasps onto it tightly.]
Don't be cruel and shake me off, okay? I really will freeze to death.
[As his CHILLY CORPSE-LIKE HANDS can probably attest to.]
(shigure voice) has he, uh, sandwiched your hands before
[LISTEN his Wei Wuxian-related crises are a very important part of his daily life. Especially now that he's been bold enough to ask to hold Wei Wuxian's hand--the magnitude of it doesn't show in his expression, of course, but he stares down at their clasped hands for a long time, very intently.
Sure enough, he can already feel Wei Wuxian's fingers beginning to warm from the contact. Hunh. Without thinking, he opens his mouth again--]
Wei Wuxian is reveling in the warmth returning to his hands, though. This is the pure, unadulterated joy of someone finally being able to curl up next to a campfire after tromping around in the snowy woods all day. WHAT A QUESTION THOUGH - one he doesn't hesitate to answer.]
I am! It's terrible! I'm surprised I'm not dead yet since I've been losing every scrap of body heat I have for hours! [It has been like, 20 minutes tops, god.] See?
[He's already claimed this hand as his for now apparently, so he just moves it up to his face, where he leans his (also cold) cheek against Lan Wangji's palm.
Like, at least he didn't just shove Lan Wangji's hand down his shirt this time.]
[And Lan Wangji... does not, but boy does it seem like he does, with the way his eyes widen and he instinctively jerks a little bit. His ears are absolutely burning at the implications, and it takes him a very long time just to relax enough for his hand to rest properly against Wei Wuxian's face.
He should've bought the damn cardigan.
Apparently it wouldn't help now, but he can't help much either, with one of his hands full. So, a little awkwardly, he shoves the wrapped parcel between them.]
Put this away. [Stick it in your breadsleeves so that he can use both hands, and also don't open it because then he'll have to explain The Hairbrush.]
[ANYWHERE just put it away so he can hold your hands again, fool!! At least even he can't bring himself to say something like "I can't warm you up with one hand"... small mercies.]
Oh! What? You actually got me one? Lan Zhan, I'm surprised! Is it a cardigan? Can I open it now?
[He's squishing the package with his one hand like that will reveal its mysterious contents to him... HOLDING HANDS WILL HAVE TO WAIT NOW. Now he's curious! What's in the bag!!!]
[WOW THAT WAS SURPRISINGLY FORCEFUL. What the fuck is in this package, a cardigan with a nipple window??
Unfortunately, as always, a strong reaction just riles up his inner bully and makes him want to tease. He gives Lan Wangji's hand a little squeeze, leaning forward with a grin.]
Hah - don't you know, Lan Zhan? When you tell me no, I just want it more.
[THE ABSOLUTE WORST... He doesn't want to lose his source of warmth though, so he's quick to back off, waving the package around.]
[It is this until proven otherwise, which Lan Wangji probably still thinks is just a weird pattern and not mesh.
But-- good, at least it's put away. Now he won't have to explain why he's returning the brush that's folded up in there as well, which is just. Too fucking awkward a conversation to have in person. AT LEAST LET HIM EXPLAIN VIA TEXT MESSAGE where he can take as long as he wants to put his words together.
Lan Wangji relaxes minutely once the package is gone--enough that, with his other hand free, he only hesitates briefly before he holds it out in offering. It's a much bigger gesture than he's making it out to be, but he's not about to indicate that and embarrass himself further, so here they are.]
[WHY DID HE NOT TOUCH IT TO FEEL THE MESH, DID HE NOT NOTICE WHEN HE WAS FOLDING THE BRUSH AWAY OR DID HE JUST NOT NOTICE oh my god. What a fuckin fool. Absolutely the worst.
It's fine though since Wei Wuxian is also the worst... He blinks owlishly at the free hand offered to him, canting his head to the side a little.]
Oh? Are you offering to warm me up, Lan Zhan?
[WHAT A CHIVALROUS FOOL. Wei Wuxian laughs - more of an actual laugh and less of his usual cackling - and immediately GRABS THAT HAND. Which he then promptly plants on his other cheek, so Lan Wangji is sandwiching his face now.]
--except then Wei Wuxian is stealing his hands for lewd face-sandwiching purposes, and it's decidedly not fine anymore. He inhales sharply, but he was the one who offered, and Wei Wuxian really is ice cold to the touch. It would be cruel to deny him, and Lan Wangji doesn't make a habit of taking things back as it is, so. Here they are.
Staring at Wei Wuxian's face when they're like this is probably weird, and it's definitely inappropriate, but Lan Wangji can't bring himself to look away. Terrible.
He stands there, trying to keep his thoughts under control, until the silence would be uncomfortable for anyone besides Wei "utterly impervious to awkwardness" Wuxian. Eventually, he trusts himself to open his mouth again.]
[Yeah he's lucky Wei Wuxian just lets any and all awkward shit slide like water off a duck's back. Does he even notice how awkward the direct staring and silence is?? PROBABLY NOT. He's too busy feeling triumphant for some reason that he's actually managed to get Lan Wangji to hold his face like this, even if it's because he's freezing to death.
As the seconds pass, it does seem like he was telling the truth about the charm, though. His cheeks warm up beneath Lan Wangji's palms, and his posture relaxes a little, not full of quite so much of the rigidity that comes along with Being Cold.]
Mmhm! It's nice - much better than before! I'm still pretty chilly, though.
[Just in case Lan Wangji was thinking "oh okay good I can let go now". NO. NO ESCAPE. He keeps Lan Wangji's hands locked with his own, humming out a cheery little nonsense tune as the lava fuckin burbles away above and below them. This is fine.]
You don't mind doing this until I'm warm again, do you? It's not like we have anywhere else to go right now anyway.
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Hey, why are you asking like that? Don't look at me, I don't know what it is! I didn't do anything this time!
[This time, unlike the millions of other times he's been at fault for shit.]
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[EXTREME DOUBT AND JUDGMENT.
For the time being, though, Lan Wangji doesn't say anything about the contact, since he's a little preoccupied with FLEEING FROM THE LAVA RACING DOWN THE HALL BEHIND THEM. Fortunately, there are stairs ahead of them that lead back outside; maybe if they're lucky, whatever triggered this stupid lava curse will end once they're in fresh air.
He drags another sheet of ice up behind them, but he gives no verbal warning--not a single "be careful" or "hold on". The only indicator Wei Wuxian might have is the brief tightening of Lan Wangji's grip on his wrist before they're being all but launched to the top of the stairs to GET THE HECK OUTTA DODGE. Probably this would've been better if Lan Wangji had wrapped an arm around him or something, instead of risking dislocating Wei Wuxian's shoulder, but he's still kind of in his "I don't touch others" phase, so. Alas.]
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It doesn't actually dislocate but one sure would think as much with the fuss Wei Wuxian kicks up over it...]
Ow, ow - Lan Zhan, give me a little warning next time! Do you think I have detachable limbs or something? My arm's not going to fall off like a gecko's tail if you tug too hard, you know!
[BUT HEY at least they're at the top of the stairs and the lava seems to stick to the floor they left behind!
Too bad that looking up to the next floor reveals that it too has turned to lava.]
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...One of these is probably more pressing than the other. Yet he stops, frowning down at where he's grasping Wei Wuxian's wrist.]
Wei Ying, you are cold.
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I know! You only have to deal with my cold hands - imagine how I feel!
[HE'S SUFFERING. Even surrounded by lava he feels The Chill In His Bones. Being reminded of it makes him curl his hands around Lan Wangji's arms even more tightly out of reflex, suppressing the shiver that runs up his spine.]
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Technically, they could probably try to fly over the lava or something, but that seems like it's just asking for trouble. They're stuck here for now... so Lan Wangji turns his attention fully to Wei Wuxian, searching his face carefully.]
Poison? [it's not a bad first guess]
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Wei Wuxian looks more or less fine, though! No telltale signs of poisoning - sweating or pupil dilation or dry lips. He just looks like a miserable person who's been standing out in the snow for too long... So he shakes his head and then makes a face.]
Have a little more faith in me than that, would you? I hate being poisoned.
[So naturally, he's used his stupid genius to figure out about fifty different ways to keep himself safe from it. PROBABLY WHY PEOPLE JUST KEEP GOING FOR GOOD OL' FASHIONED STABS AND BLUDGEONS.]
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Apparently Lan Wangji's missed the memo about the cursed objects, though; with the most likely reason eliminated, he just frowns, moving to let go of Wei Wuxian's wrist.]
Then why?
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[HIS FROZEN CORPSE WILL BE SO SAD. He just barnacles on to Lan Wangji's more tightly than before, in DESPAIR.]
It's a charm, that's all! You haven't run into any yet? Aie, why is it that luck favors you so much more than me?
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No. [Maybe because he doesn't pick up random things he finds!!! Or maybe his reputation got him out of this one, because what's the point of a freeze charm on an ice prince.] What charm?
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Anyway this is stupid and he makes a face.]
A "touch this thing and you'll be cold until the day you die maybe unless you find someone else to touch instead" charm.
[So yes, yes he did go out of his way to find Lan Wangji with the express intent to hold his hand. Or arm, as it were. GOOD ENOUGH FOR HIM.]
You really haven't seen any of the charmed things at all yet? Not a single one? There are a lot out there, people have been running into them all week. I was doing so good at avoiding them, too... [SIGH.]
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And, look. Maybe Lan Wangji heard people talking about these charms and just assumed it was a ploy related to prom. Maybe he's just been so fucking distracted by the shirt he's still got tucked under his other arm that he hasn't paid any attention to school happenings lately. Maybe he just intentionally blocked it out because if he didn't, his mind would probably dream up a situation exactly like this one!! WHO KNOWS.
Regardless, this is, apparently, a real thing that is really happening. Even with the obvious evidence, though, Lan Wangji's finding it hard to trust that this isn't just one of Wei Wuxian's attempts to rile him up, or to tease him, since Lan Wangji's pretty firm about rejecting physical contact with people.
Wei Wuxian never seems to notice that he doesn't do that with him, though... no, no, no getting distracted. There's a simple way to test this!
He looks at Wei Wuxian for a minute, far too calm considering they're surrounded by lava--then twists out of his grip, but only to reach out again.]
Give me your hand. [He can't prove anything if Wei Wuxian just barnacles onto his arm, okay, he needs direct contact for. Evidence. Yes.]
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WOW THOUGH well damn he's not about to pass up this choice opportunity?? Even like this, he can still spare a crumb of totally normal just-two-bros-chillin-in-a-hottub excitement for having a totally legit reason to hold his hand. Without hesitation, both his hands fly for Lan Wangji's and he clasps onto it tightly.]
Don't be cruel and shake me off, okay? I really will freeze to death.
[As his CHILLY CORPSE-LIKE HANDS can probably attest to.]
(shigure voice) has he, uh, sandwiched your hands before
Sure enough, he can already feel Wei Wuxian's fingers beginning to warm from the contact. Hunh. Without thinking, he opens his mouth again--]
You are like this all over?
[closes my eyes intensely]
I FUCKING HATE THIS AND THEM
Wei Wuxian is reveling in the warmth returning to his hands, though. This is the pure, unadulterated joy of someone finally being able to curl up next to a campfire after tromping around in the snowy woods all day. WHAT A QUESTION THOUGH - one he doesn't hesitate to answer.]
I am! It's terrible! I'm surprised I'm not dead yet since I've been losing every scrap of body heat I have for hours! [It has been like, 20 minutes tops, god.] See?
[He's already claimed this hand as his for now apparently, so he just moves it up to his face, where he leans his (also cold) cheek against Lan Wangji's palm.
Like, at least he didn't just shove Lan Wangji's hand down his shirt this time.]
I HATE IT MORE
He should've bought the damn cardigan.
Apparently it wouldn't help now, but he can't help much either, with one of his hands full. So, a little awkwardly, he shoves the wrapped parcel between them.]
Put this away. [Stick it in your breadsleeves so that he can use both hands, and also don't open it because then he'll have to explain The Hairbrush.]
NO I DO
What the heck though?? He blinks, reluctantly releasing Lan Wangji's hand so he has a free one to grab this mystery item.]
Put it away where? What is it?
[He's not gonna shove shit into his breadsleeves without knowing what he's shoving in there!!]
punts u into the sea
[ANYWHERE just put it away so he can hold your hands again, fool!! At least even he can't bring himself to say something like "I can't warm you up with one hand"... small mercies.]
:moyai:
[He's squishing the package with his one hand like that will reveal its mysterious contents to him... HOLDING HANDS WILL HAVE TO WAIT NOW. Now he's curious! What's in the bag!!!]
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[NOT NOW. He sure sounds forceful about that wow... don't look at him JUST PUT IT AWAY.]
Open it later. It will get destroyed if you drop it. [look he's not wrong]
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Unfortunately, as always, a strong reaction just riles up his inner bully and makes him want to tease. He gives Lan Wangji's hand a little squeeze, leaning forward with a grin.]
Hah - don't you know, Lan Zhan? When you tell me no, I just want it more.
[THE ABSOLUTE WORST... He doesn't want to lose his source of warmth though, so he's quick to back off, waving the package around.]
But fine, fine! I'll store it away, I won't peek.
[INTO HIS SLEEVE IT GOES.]
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But-- good, at least it's put away. Now he won't have to explain why he's returning the brush that's folded up in there as well, which is just. Too fucking awkward a conversation to have in person. AT LEAST LET HIM EXPLAIN VIA TEXT MESSAGE where he can take as long as he wants to put his words together.
Lan Wangji relaxes minutely once the package is gone--enough that, with his other hand free, he only hesitates briefly before he holds it out in offering. It's a much bigger gesture than he's making it out to be, but he's not about to indicate that and embarrass himself further, so here they are.]
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It's fine though since Wei Wuxian is also the worst... He blinks owlishly at the free hand offered to him, canting his head to the side a little.]
Oh? Are you offering to warm me up, Lan Zhan?
[WHAT A CHIVALROUS FOOL. Wei Wuxian laughs - more of an actual laugh and less of his usual cackling - and immediately GRABS THAT HAND. Which he then promptly plants on his other cheek, so Lan Wangji is sandwiching his face now.]
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--except then Wei Wuxian is stealing his hands for lewd face-sandwiching purposes, and it's decidedly not fine anymore. He inhales sharply, but he was the one who offered, and Wei Wuxian really is ice cold to the touch. It would be cruel to deny him, and Lan Wangji doesn't make a habit of taking things back as it is, so. Here they are.
Staring at Wei Wuxian's face when they're like this is probably weird, and it's definitely inappropriate, but Lan Wangji can't bring himself to look away. Terrible.
He stands there, trying to keep his thoughts under control, until the silence would be uncomfortable for anyone besides Wei "utterly impervious to awkwardness" Wuxian. Eventually, he trusts himself to open his mouth again.]
...Better?
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As the seconds pass, it does seem like he was telling the truth about the charm, though. His cheeks warm up beneath Lan Wangji's palms, and his posture relaxes a little, not full of quite so much of the rigidity that comes along with Being Cold.]
Mmhm! It's nice - much better than before! I'm still pretty chilly, though.
[Just in case Lan Wangji was thinking "oh okay good I can let go now". NO. NO ESCAPE. He keeps Lan Wangji's hands locked with his own, humming out a cheery little nonsense tune as the lava fuckin burbles away above and below them. This is fine.]
You don't mind doing this until I'm warm again, do you? It's not like we have anywhere else to go right now anyway.
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